NICE LITTLE EARNER

Miss Inga Wang, email

A LITTLE old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic rubbish bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 note fell out onto the path.

A policeman noticed this, and called out to her: “Excuse me, ma’am, but there’s $20 notes falling out of your bag.”

“Oh, thank you, officer,” said the little old lady. “I’d better go back and see if I can find them.”

“Well, hang on a minute now,” said the policeman, growing suspicious. “Just where did you get all that money? You didn’t steal it, did you?”

“Oh, no,” the old lady replied. “You see, my backyard is right next to a golf course. A lot of the male golfers have a habit of coming up to a knothole in my fence and peeing through it – right into my flower garden. It vexes me no end. But then I thought, why not make the best of it? So now, I wait at the fence where the knothole is, with my hedge clippers. Every time a guy sticks his thing through my fence, I grab hold of it and say: ‘Give me $20, or off it comes.’”

The policeman laughed. “Well, that seems only fair!” he said. “Well, you have a good day, ma’am.

Oh, by the way, what’s in the other bag?”

“Well,” the old lady replied, “not everybody pays.”