Kay Neinn, email

THREE guys are sitting in a bar in front of a log fire with their dogs, and get talking about them.

The first guy says: “My dog is called Woodworker.” He then commands: “Go, Woodworker!” The dog promptly grabs a log from the fire, and then uses his teeth and paws to fashion a beautiful figurine.

The next guy says: “My dog is called Stoneworker. Go, Stoneworker!” The dog immediately drags a rock from the edge of the fire and carves a beautiful sculpture out of it.

The third one says: “My dog is called Ironworker.” He then puts the fire tongs into the fire and gets them red hot. “Now,” he says, “I’ll just touch him on the balls with this and then he’ll make a bolt for the door.”