Nuvo Cation, email

SO I WAS in my car, driving along, and my boss rang up. He said: “You’ve been promoted.” I was so shocked that I swerved.

And then he rang up a second time and said: “You’ve been promoted again.” And I swerved again.

He rang up a third time and said: “You’re now the managing director.” And I ploughed into a tree.

Then a policeman drove up and said: “What happened to you?”

I replied: “I careered off the road.”