Car-spiracy theory

ďMY BIGGEST FEAR WITH THE CLUB REGO SCHEME IS THAT DICKHEADS WILL RUIN ITĒ

Mike Andrew, Email

I may be cynic, or maybe this is what happens to you with six generations of Australian bloodline all resulting from a forbear being a guest of the establishment and sent to Tasmania for seven years.

Anyway, while most State governments are happily dishing out historic registrations for all and sundry to take up the governmentís generous offer to get your pride and joy on the road cheaply, has anyone stopped and thought that the same friendly government folk did not know in the first instance that you had such a valuable asset sitting in your garage?

With historic rego they do now!

Would Governments be so blatant as to maybe put a value on your car, or as in my case several cars?

Then, having established that these assets are very valuable, would they hit you with a tax? Or just maybe they would see these valuable assets as a means of stopping you getting a pensionÖ It could happen: Something you bought for a couple of grand years ago; thousands of dollars spent on it; in storage for many years; now worth big bucks.

Would the government now want to get a piece of that action? Bet your bits on it!

ďMY BIGGEST FEAR WITH THE CLUB REGO SCHEME IS THAT DICKHEADS WILL RUIN ITĒ

Morley says...

JEEZ MIKE, Iíd never thought of it like that before.

And to be honest, the fact that Iíve never really been all that blessed with anything approaching an asset, I donít really know what does and doesnít qualify as an actual asset under the law. On the surface, a collectible car does indeed comply with the literal definition of an asset, that is: Anything that can be converted into cash, so maybe your scenario aint so far-fetched.

Thing is, though, I donít really think the club or historic rego schemes are designed to flush out assets and add them to the ledger.

Donít get me wrong: Iím the last bloke on earth likely to give the government any credit for honesty, integrity or truthfulness, and Iím damn certain the club-plates schemes do, in fact, delivery the various State governments a bit of a windfall, but itís not in the way youíve suggested. See, from what I can see, the States with the really healthy permit schemes are the ones that have a whole bunch of tasty old cars out on the roads on weekends. And old cars on the road means that the fixit trade and the spare parts guys are all doing better business as a result.

And that means those fellas A: Are not on the dole, and B: Pay taxes. The more they make, the more tax they pay (unless you own a mining company, apparently).

Also (and this has been my personal experience) by offering me a club permit at a reduced rate, the government will at least get something out of me on an annual basis. Were I forced to pay full-freight on the yearly registration for all my cars, Iíd leave them in the shed and just register one.

So the government arguably makes more money by allowing me to run my old dungers on a club permit (I still have a daily car on full-whack rego, of course) because itís getting something rather than nothing.

My biggest fear with the club rego schemes is that the dickheads out there will ruin it for those of us who do the right thing. I shudder when I see cars with big, blown engines poking out the bonnet, a set of wheeltubs and a pair of club-permit plates hanging off them. There are modified-car rego schemes for machines like that, so do the right thing guys and gals. Iíd also hate to think anybody was trying to fiddle their logbook, because behaviour like that, too, will give the do-gooders ammo in their constant battle against the concept of anybody else having fun.

If you know anybody on a club plate whoís doing the wrong thing, take them aside and have a quiet chat. ĎCos if they wreck it for everybody else, me and the boysíll be round to play surprise visitor. And we wonít be as understanding as the nice man from the government.