MOVING MAYHEM

JUST LIKE ANY KID, GLENN TORRENS DISCOVERS THAT PLAYING WITH TOYS MEANS HE HAS TO PACK THEM ALL UP, TOO

WORDS & PHOTOS GLENN TORRENS

MOST PEOPLE dread moving house. It’s even worse if you’re a car nut: all those panels, spare wheels, suspension bits, engine parts, gearboxes, seats and one-daysoon projects are a pain in the butt to move.

So, when I moved house four years ago, I swore to the heavens that the next time would be the last time! I promised myself I’d buy a house with a nice big workshop/shed in the backyard so I could stop wasting time and money renting both a small halfhouse for myself and an industrial unit for my toys.

To cut a long story short, recently I bought a house with a big backyard shed, and began the most enormous moving job of my life!

Regular Unique Cars readers will probably be aware of the great fun I have with my bright-yellow VW Beetles; a hill-climb/track/drag-Bug and my similarly-painted saltlake racer: Well, I must confess I haven’t been totally honest

“I’M HAPPY TO NEVER, EVER, EVER HAVE TO MOVE HOUSE AGAIN”

with you lot… Even though I sold my red VW Cabriolet and bought another one, I also own six other Bugs (in various states of disassembly) plus a Holden Commodore. And… ummm… some other stuff.

Everything had to be moved.

First to be relocated were four Bugs that I had parked against the back fence; only one had an engine and registration so three had to be winched onto my car float and then rolled-off into my new backyard. Then, my attention turned to the yellow track twins; they share the same engine – so one is usually engine-less – but installing a spare engine (most VW nuts have a spare engine!) into Salty meant both yellow terrors could be easily driven on and off the car float.

With that done, my attention turned to another engine-less VW Beetle shell/ chassis, then another, then my Holden Commodore. It hadn’t been started for two years but with a few litres of fresh fuel in its tank and a splash more into the carby, my 5.0-litre V8, four-speed ’79 Commodore SL/E roared into life so it, too, could be driven onto a carfloat – borrowed from a mate; my own float was just a little

too short – for transport.

With that task done, I had access to the last of my VWs, a classic 1956 oval-window sedan which I’ve owned for 25 years. Speaking of mates, I had a terrific crew to help me: John and Joanne, Dodty, Jase, Johnny Two Pack, Buggy Geoff and Lowey all lent a hand at various times during more than two weeks of often exhausting and stressful effort. To say thanks to them, they’ll all be enjoying a damn big BBQ and lots of beers at my place as soon as all this is over… With all the cars moved, we loaded four engines, half a dozen gearboxes, several dozen mudguards and doors, bonnets and boot lids, a spare six-point roll cage, three bare chassis, six sets of seats, at least a dozen sets of mag wheels, four other trailers, all my tools, crates of shockies, four windscreens, my beer fridge … and a whole lot of other crap. As I write this, building shelves and sorting of parts will keep me busy every evening for at least a month!

Yep, I’ll be very happy to never, ever, ever, EVER have to move house again!

GT’S TOP SHED MOVING TIPS

Don't! Plan in advance to pump up tyres and charge batteries; There is no such thing as too many Volkswagens; Do not under any circumstances get rid of anything, no matter how stuffed - you never know when you need it; Broken bones and sprained backs are generally fixed with a well-lubricated babecue.