AS YOU MAY have noticed we don’t do a whole lot with new cars in this mag, and even then it tends to be a quick spin that draws a line to its historic predecessors. Really, I get plenty of entertainment driving old toys and the new stuff is occasional icing on the cake.

Sure, when the new Mustang finally arrived, there was a bit of a queue for the keys, but otherwise 90 per cent of what hits the showroom has us stifling yawns.

There are exceptions. Mark ‘Higgo’ Higgins recently snatched the remote (whatever happened to keys?) to an F-Type Jag, the SVR version. Very nice. About the same amount of alcantra inside as my flash-as-a-rat-with-a-goldtooth Kingswood, and a little less leather.

However the Kingswood doesn’t have an adjustable carbon fibre spoiler, or enough horsepower to tow Parliament House into the ocean. The Jag does. Holy flapping conrods, Batman, does it get your attention when you plant the right foot!

With the suspicion that it was probably worth a dollar or two, I made room under a carport and even put a cover over it. You see we have cats with muddy paws, who like to tap-dance across any automobile we’re silly enough to leave within reach. There’s only so many times a week you can wash a car and still enjoy the process…

So there I was, pondering the now-covered Jag, casually wondering what it was worth. Over $350k apparently – more than enough to make you choke on your claret. Jeezuz H Kerrist! That’s by far the most expensive cat trampoline we’ve ever had at Chateau Despair. All of a sudden I was looking forward to giving it back, so someone else could take responsibility for the monster.

Higgo will give you the full version of the story next ish, but I have nothing against uber-expensive cars. If you can afford one, go nuts.

This is where having resources makes all the difference. If you had the cash, you would no doubt enjoy the thing immensely, and it would be interesting to see where it sits in the market compared to something like an E-type when they were new. At the moment, the price of an F-type SVR would buy a couple of very nice E-types.

However that’s all a bit rich for Muggins. I’ve been pondering Jag ownership for a while and have been tempted often by assorted versions of the XJ-S, the prices of which seem to be climbing steadily north, in the wake of rising E-type values.

You know what? I’m starting to think a decent XK8, like the one pictured, which you can get for mid thirties through to early forties. That would be more than enough to keep me satisfied, and the cats could tap-dance on it to their little hearts’ content…

Guy ‘Guido’ Allen

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